JOEY, IT’S YOUR OLD MAN AGAIN, YOUR AGE IS YOUR STRENGTH. HERE’S ANOTHER SPEECH YOU GOTTA GIVE…
My friends, you all know that with age comes wisdom. Yes, I’m old and my body isn’t as strong as it once was, and I may stutter. I stutter…So what? I stuttered when I was a young man in the Senate. The things I think, and say, stutter or not, are borne out of many years of experience in trying to make things better for us. For all of us. And I’m gonna have a young, smart, vital bunch of advisors around me, and a cabinet with ideas to move us forward. Donald Trump will have Steven Miller. And Steve Bannon. And Project 2025. Is that what we want? Really? That’s what Trump wants, and what he’ll bring — if we let him.
Have you taken a good look at Steven Miller’s face lately? Do the words sullen, resentful, and out to get even, come to mind? This guy has been called the “Angel of Darkness.” He was seen enjoying watching immigrant mother’s and children being separated at the border. This creep is more evil than you even know. He is the quintessential hatemonger. A link between the white nationalist agenda and the Trump White House. Do you want this guy making policy? Well, that’s who you’ll get if you get Donald Trump. And you’ll get The Heritage Society, the authors of Project 2025, a Draconian plan which has alarmed our allies, and which, among other things, proposes that the “federal Department of Education should be eliminated,” and which would increase the “country’s reliance on fossil fuels.” It proposes to “withdraw from efforts to address the climate crisis.” How about that future for your children and grandchildren? The list of its authoritarian proposals is shocking. And it’s what we’ll get with a Donald Trump. If we let him.
Yeah, I may be up there in age, but I know what I’m doing. While the guy I’m fixing to beat again is an unread, uneducated boor. A guy who thinks that talking loud counts for something. A guy who’s a blowhard, and a braggart. Who knows zilch about governance, and who couldn’t care less about you and your needs. He’s just an empty suit ready to be filled with the hate, the division, and the Fascism that the forces he’s fronting for are promoting. Look it up. Read what he, and these people are eager and ready to do — if we let him.
Yeah, I’m old. So? I consider my age to be a positive! My age equals experience! You young people, sit down with your grandparents and speak with them over an early bird sometime. You’ll soon realize the smarts it takes to get to be their age. They may not know about computers, or Tik Tok, but they sure know how to overcome! You’d be surprised at how much they can teach you. They know how to keep going in the face of adversity. They’ve jumped a lot of hurdles in their lives. And so have I. So have I. Sure, I may be old, but I’m smart enough to surround myself with the very best, the finest, and the smartest people in this country. People who have pledged to work to make things better for you. For all of us. Project 2025 is the evidence that proves my opponent will do the exact opposite! If we let him!
They say you can’t teach an old dog new tricks. First of all, science has proved that old dogs, like me, can, and do learn new tricks. Secondly, I’m not interested in tricks. Tricks is what this mug Trump is all about. He’s been tricking people his entire adult life. And, he’s trying to trick you all now. Well my friends, I’m not gonna let him. I’m calling him on all his bull. He’s a proven liar — over 35,000 of them. He lied to your faces over 30 times in our recent debate! He’s nothing but a con-man, who will get his hand in your pocket — if you let him. You know all those warnings we get against scammers pretending to be what they’re not? Trump is one of these scammers. One of the best. There should be a warning on the screen every time this guy opens his yap. Don’t be scammed! The stakes are too high. The lies out of his mouth are dangerous. He can rob us all of our rights — if we let him!
I’m old. But I’m also honest. I’m old, but I’m on your side. My record shows I’ve got the experience and the know-how to do this job, and to put the best people to work on our problems. Let’s get this done. Thank you my friends. May God bless us and may God bless our troops.
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